fears

I need the stability of routine.
Little changes help me through.
Often before have I seen this time,
And likewise not known what to do.

All day long I keep busy.
In a flash I start to ponder.
This time no talking to Stacey,
I am alone to feel the thunder.

Untidy though my thoughts may be.
Never settling on matters they should.
I press forward in time to see,
Not what I could but did.

Why.
I begin to see not an answer.
Why not.
What is my purpose here?

Where should I be doing this?
How can I choose this?
What may I choose?
Can an opportunity, I lose?